it has been 19 days.
19 days of longing. 19 days of wishing. 19 days of what could have beens.
it was a bitter sweet Christmas.
we were blessed with James Benedict on Christmas day.
but he was called to be an angel 37 days after.
37 days of needles. pricking. tubes and machines. tests.
xrays. meds. transfusions. doctors. nurses.
37 days of suffering.
i was never given a chance to hold my baby in my arms.
and an incubator separated us from feeling each other.
i can spend only15 minutes with him in the nursery ICU.
i wasn't given a chance to show him a mommy.
and everyday passes with missing him.
so many questions in my head. so many if onlys and what ifs.
my heart is broken.
a piece of it was buried with James.
how do we go on? how do i move on?
how can i start mending my broken heart?
19 days of longing. 19 days of wishing. 19 days of what could have beens.
it was a bitter sweet Christmas.
we were blessed with James Benedict on Christmas day.
but he was called to be an angel 37 days after.
37 days of needles. pricking. tubes and machines. tests.
xrays. meds. transfusions. doctors. nurses.
37 days of suffering.
i was never given a chance to hold my baby in my arms.
and an incubator separated us from feeling each other.
i can spend only15 minutes with him in the nursery ICU.
i wasn't given a chance to show him a mommy.
and everyday passes with missing him.
so many questions in my head. so many if onlys and what ifs.
my heart is broken.
a piece of it was buried with James.
how do we go on? how do i move on?
how can i start mending my broken heart?
Oh Tna, I'm so sorry about your loss. My words will not ease the pain in your heart but still I want you to know how sad and sorry I am right now. My prayers for you and your family .... please be strong and keep your faith alive.
ReplyDeleteHugs for you,
Mei Ann